Vonda Urban – USA
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[Note from the editor: Vonda Urban (1918–2011) was an American ballroom dance instructor, spiritual teacher, astrologer, and independent scholar of Theosophy who became a well-known figure in Chicago's entertainment and esoteric communities.]
"The feeling of responsibility is inspired by the presence of the Light of the Higher Ego. As the Ego in its cycle of rebirth becomes more and more individualized, it learns more and more by suffering to recognize its own responsibility, by which it finally gains Self-consciousness, the consciousness of all the Egos of the whole Universe ... The feeling of responsibility is the beginning of Wisdom, a proof that ahankara is beginning to fade out, the beginning of losing the sense of separateness. " (The Secret Doctrine, Adyar edition, 1950, Book 5, pp. 552-53.)
Responsibility is the Spiritual-intellectual impetus underlying our sense of duty and self-abnegation. It is the dynamic action of Heart and Mind blending reason with compassion in selfless service for others - the Will to choose duty above desire, discipline above indulgence; the intelligence to distinguish between right and wrong with rational action based upon thoughtful deliberation and judgement, in contrast to sentimentality or emotional impulsiveness; it is dependable, reliable, trustworthy and accountable; the character out giving and as opposed to ingathering and self-centered. Our Responsibility I-Q is governed by knowledge, impersonality and altruism, the varying levels and degrees of which combine the ability of our "know-how" with our capacity to reach outward and touch the Universal Oneness in Brotherhood. Thus, the extent that we are able or willing to shoulder responsibility may be limited but to the duty and loving sacrifice that serves only our immediate family - or our devotion may embrace the total Human Family and serve Mankind.
In Practical Occultism we are taught: "Accustom yourself to the thought that no one beside Yourself can assist you, and wean away your affections from all things gradually." (p. 71.) ... What a profound depth of instruction and discipline lies within the meaning of these words! Such training reaches ultimately to the Initiation Chamber where our Personal Ego must pass through the dread trials alone - temporarily separated from its Higher Self, unaided by the Teacher - to triumph or fail, completely on its own. Herein is the fundamental guideline pointing out the importance and reason why self-reliance and detachment from the personality are primary requirements for Spiritual unfoldment. These qualities are basic to the feeling of responsibility. Without self-reliance, we lean upon others; without impersonality, our egotistical biases and prejudices feed the Great Heresy of Separateness. The path of Chelaship demands self-reliance, self-discipline and self-sacrifice; and to travel on it, altruism must be made the aim of life. The rules of Occultism will not bend to cushion our weakness and mistakes. We either make or miss the mark in how we live each single day. This point is very clearly made by W.Q. Judge in answer to the question: "What is the 'daily initiation'?" (Echoes of the Orient, Vol. II, pp. 401-2.):
It is supposed by some that initiation is always and in every case a set and solemn occasion for which the candidate is prepared and notified of in advance. While there are some initiations surrounded by such solemnities as these, the daily one, without success in which no aspirant will ever have the chance to try for those that are higher, comes to the disciple with almost each moment. It is met in our relations with our fellows, and in the effects upon us of all the circumstances of life. And if we fail in these, we never get to the point where greater ones are offered. If we cannot bear momentary defeat, or if a chance word that strikes our self-love finds us unprepared, or if we give way to the desire to harshly judge others, or if we remain in ignorance of some of our most apparent faults, we do not build up that knowledge and strength imperatively demanded from whoever is to be master of nature ...
Do you think that if a Master accepted you He would put you to some strange test? No, He would not, but simply permitting the small events of your life to have their course, the result would determine your standing. It may be a child's school, but it takes a man to go through it.
And what about the testing of the good deeds that we do in acts both great and small that benefit our fellow man? It is just here that the razor's edge cuts sharp and deep the line of demarcation between a self-giving or self-serving motive hidden beneath the outer showing of the good we do for others: just here that the choice is made between altruism and opportunism, marking the direction toward either the Right or Left-hand Path. Motive is everything. The test is simply whether, in serving mankind, we also seek reward or benefit for oneself. "What's in it for me" is, of course, the selfish, competitive way of the world living in the callous sense of separateness. But this cannot be for him who aspires to Spiritual unfoldment; for him who would become one with the All. Altruism is renunciation of the personal self. The sacrifice we make each day is all that registers upon the mystic ledger.
The first big test of our Responsibility I.Q. comes in how we accept the "slings and arrows of outrageous fortune" as the Karmic retribution of our own wrong doing, now coming home to roost. Here is the stringent measure of our self-reliance and accountability. It is very easy to expect the good happenings that come to us to be our just deserts of merit; but quite another thing to face the negative side of this and realize that we also filled the hateful cup of gall we drink; aye, to the last bitter dregs. In self-pity, we may even search for the scape goat of unmerited Karma, crying: "someone else did this to me" - until we understand that "rigid justice rules the world. With mighty sweep of never erring action, it brings to mortals lives of weal or woe, the Karmic progeny of all our thoughts and deeds." (The Voice of the Silence, p. 45.)
Nor can a heart filled with compassion also have room to hold the tears shed for "poor me." In this is found the clue that, overcoming self-pity, is the first step toward self-reliance and accountability. Here too is a guide for using judgement and discrimination in acts of charity, for if we can help another to learn to give something of themselves, however little, at the same time they take assistance to relieve their suffering, their door to aspiration has cracked open. It is a fact of human nature that the more we do for another, the more is expected if we allow the habit of taking to grow. It is also true that, until one desires to uplift himself, nothing can be done for him; so, if we are unable morally to strengthen the one we help, then there is danger of doing more harm than good. But pain and suffering are our greatest teachers, bringing a catharsis of the soul; an awakening of consciousness; a time of searching; an opening to new ideas; and more often we find, in helping lift another's burden, that we have met a fellow pilgrim seeking the Path that leads upward. We seized the moment of the opportunity that came our way to rise a little above Ahankara, and hold the sacred trust of Brotherhood inviolate.
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